in search of "normal"

perhaps my biggest frustration in dealing with my disabilities is accepting my "new normal".
I dream (many times literally) of being "normal" again ...

• to have a clear and unrestricted field of vision
• to be able to walk without fear of falling
• to be able to concentrate and speak as I once was able
• to be able to pick up and hold my grandchildren
• to be able to prepare food without the fear of amputating a digit (or two)
• to be able to once again fly dual line sport kites
• to be free of pain and the constant numbness in my feet and legs
• to drive a car
• I even dream of having a job again

I work every single day towards realizing those dreams even though I know that many (most) are unattainable, it would be a lie to say that there aren't times the frustration is unbearable and I lose it ... but so far I have always managed to refocus and get back on track. honestly, that is now my purpose in life ... not going off the "deep end". it is a very dark place that just terrifies me.

there is just one place I can go where I actually feel normal. sometimes, but not always
 I can close my eyes and get into a posture and meditative state where all my physical restrictions are no longer noticeable and my mind is truly at peace.
sometimes I feel that is the place I should be always ...

... do you think that is what heaven (or Nirvana) is like?